Separation

Deciding whether to separate is never straightforward, whatever your circumstances. Sometimes the decision is not of your making and that can be as difficult to come to terms with. At Evolve Family Law, we talk to clients who are: • Not sure of what they want to do; or • Clear that divorce is the right option for them; or • Have been separated for many years and want advice on changing or enforcing financial or children court orders. Many people are wary about taking divorce advice because they think they should know what they want to do before they see a solicitor. That is not the case. Experienced solicitors always like to discuss options so you can make an informed decision about what is right for you. Should we separate? That is a tough decision that only you can make. As experienced Manchester divorce solicitors, we can talk to you about your legal options and potential outcomes. Many people canvass views from friends and family when deciding whether to separate. Everyone has his or her own experiences and agenda but what Evolve Family Law will not do is push you into a separation or divorce. When should I tell my partner? Timing can be crucial, as you may want to think about making sure that you have access to funds, your paperwork and possessions before talking to your partner. You may also want to make sure that you or your partner can have space away from one another. For some people that involves making sure they can stay with friends or family or that their partner can do so. If you are worried about your partner’s reaction, you may need an injunction. Talking to the children Ideally, parents should talk to children together so that the children know that both parents are going to continue to look after them, but in separate households. There is a lot of information and support available for both parents and children to help parents answer children’s questions in an age appropriate way. Leaving the family home It is always sensible to take legal advice from a Manchester divorce solicitor before leaving the family home. Many people think that if you leave the family home you will lose your claim to a share of the property. That is not the case but the decision to leave the family home can have a big impact on the children and on how long it can take to reach an agreement. Legal advice is therefore key to making the right decision, rather than feeling pressurised or desperate to leave, as you do not know your options. Secure your computer and your documents If you take the decision is taken to separate you may want to keep some information private. Think about changing passwords for your phone, laptop or computer. At a later stage, you will need to provide your financial documents and paperwork. If you are concerned that your partner may remove your paperwork make sure that you put it in a safe place as it can take time to obtain duplicate information. Joint bank accounts and credit cards If you and your partner have joint bank accounts and credit cards you may want to think about making sure that funds are not taken from the accounts. Ideally, this is something that should be agreed. However, if you fear that funds could be taken then accounts can be frozen or overdraft or credit facilities reduced. Many couples who are able to split up on an amicable basis continue to use a joint account until they reach a financial settlement. This is not appropriate for all families. [related_posts] Maintenance and child-support People worry about paying bills if they split up from a partner. Ideally, after taking legal advice, you and your partner will discuss financial support to include spousal maintenance or child maintenance until you decide, on a long-term basis, how assets and property should be split. Taking advice from a Manchester divorce solicitor will help you know what is fair and reasonable. If you cannot reach agreement then mediation may help you sort out temporary financial arrangements. If you and your partner struggle to agree then the court can make temporary financial support orders. Whether you decide to separate, divorce or stay Evolve Family Law can help you explore your legal options so you can make an informed decision. For legal help with divorce proceedings and financial claims or childcare arrangements please call Contact Us Today

You would think that in the 21 century we would all know what domestic abuse is. Sadly, that is still not the case. As a divorce and children solicitor, I still come across spouses and other legal professionals who talk of ‘a bit of a push' or seem to think that the inappropriate behaviour was ok because the children did not see it. The good news is that domestic violence is now in the news for the right reasons as the government is introducing a new bill that will: Introduce a legal definition of domestic abuse to include economic abuse, as well as controlling and manipulative non-physical abuse; and Stop the cross-examination of domestic violence victims by their abusive ex-partners in the family courts ; and Make domestic violence perpetrators go into behaviour-changing rehabilitation programmes ; and Make victims of domestic violence automatically able to get protection when they give evidence in criminal trials ; and Clarify how “Clare's Law” should work. This law lets the police tell a member of the public if there are concerns over about previous violence committed by their partner ; and The creation of the role of national domestic abuse commissioner. They will improve the public services response and support for victims of domestic violence. What is domestic abuse? Some forms of domestic abuse are obvious but I will list them all: Physical abuse ; this can range from extreme violence to a punch , shove or push; Sexual abuse; this can be all forms of unwanted sexual contact; Psychological or mental abuse; this can range from extreme mind games to derogatory remarks , for example ,telling someone they are a ‘’nutter’’ ; Harassment ; this can range from stalking type behaviour outside someone’s home to online harassment on social media accounts; Coercion and control; this can take many forms; from not allowing a spouse to leave the family home unaccompanied to financial control and restricting a spouse’s access to funds. Some people will not recognise all of those behaviours as abusive but they are. Response to domestic abuse As a divorce and children solicitor, I meet husband and wives’ who have been subjected to domestic abuse. Their response can be: Accepting of the behaviour ; often a spouse will be told that the domestic abuse is their fault , for example , if only they did not ‘‘wind them up’’ it would not happen; Normalising the behaviour ; thinking that it is’’ just a bit of a slap’’; Denying the behaviour ; thinking that the domestic abuse is ‘’ all in their mind,’’ often after having been repeatedly told that they are the ones with the mental illness; Responding to the behaviour ; by starting to become abusive to their spouse or others as domestic abuse has become the ‘’norm’’ within the household; Justifying the behaviour; for example saying that the domestic abuse only happens because of a spouse’s stressful job or family pressures. However, someone responds to domestic abuse they will need help and support to come to terms with the impact of domestic abuse. The impact of domestic abuse Most experts are agreed that being subjected to or witnessing domestic abuse can lead to: Low self-esteem; Low mood; Isolation from friends and family; Indecisiveness. Often spouses take the decision to leave when they see the impact that adult domestic abuse is having on the children. A parent can be a loving mum or dad to their children but abuse their spouse. Even if the children do not always see the abuse, the atmosphere and tension can be very damaging to their welfare. [related_posts] Injunction court orders An injunction order is just one means of protecting a spouse or children from domestic abuse. An injunction is a court order stopping a named person from taking a step or ordering a step to be taken, such as: Stopping an assault or harassment by an ex- partner (called a non-molestation order); Ordering one spouse to leave a family home until the court decides what should happen long term with the family home  (called an occupation order ); Removing a child from one parent’s care if child abduction is a fear; Preventing one spouse from taking money and assets until the court decides how property and assets is split in the financial settlement (called a freezing order). If you are concerned about your children, the court can also make an urgent child arrangements order. This order settles with whom the children should live and whether they should have contact with the other parent. In a crisis, the court can make temporary orders in addition to injunction orders. How do you get an injunction order? You, or your solicitor, have to make a court application, supported by a statement and evidence. The evidence you need depends on what you are trying to stop or prevent. What are the grounds for an injunction order? The grounds depend on the injunction order that is requested from the court. If you are worried about your safety or the physical or emotional safety of your child, Evolve Family Law can assess your options, including the option of applying for an injunction order. Is an injunction order permanent? Normally injunctions are temporary court orders designed to help a family until they or, if necessary, the court is able to make long-term decisions about the custody and contact arrangements for a child or the sale or transfer of the family home. However, an injunction order can be an essential protective measure that is needed before long term decisions can be made. Legal help with domestic abuse If you need help to apply for or oppose an injunction or children application then our specialist team of family solicitors can help take urgent steps to protect you and your family. Contact Us Today