Divorce

Whilst we are all living in unprecedented times and there are no certainties about when we will come out of the government imposed Covid-19 lockdown and know the full economic impact of coronavirus, questions are already being asked about whether the family court can be asked to change a financial court order because of the effect of Covid-19. In this blog we look at if you can ask a court to change your financial court order because of coronavirus.Online family law financial settlement solicitors Cheshire and Manchester based Evolve Family Law solicitors are working online to advise existing and new family law clients on all coronavirus related family law questions including financial issues arising from Covid 19. If you need advice on your financial court order or any other aspect of family law call Evolve Family Law on 0345 222 8 222 or complete our online enquiry form to set up a video conference or telephone appointment.Jump to: Can a financial court order be changed? Covid-19 and changing financial court orders What is a Barder event? Is Covid-19 a Barder event? Can a financial court order be changed? Many people think that once a financial court order has been made then ‘’that’s it’’ but some aspects of a financial court order can be changed by making a variation application. Examples of when you can apply to vary a financial court order include: Applying to stop spousal maintenance payments Applying to reduce or increase the amount of spousal maintenance payments Applying to extend the length of time that spousal maintenance payments are paid for Applying to discharge or vary a child support maintence requirement contained in a financial court order such as a child support court order for step-children, a top up child support order or a child support order for a disabled child Applying to end or vary a school fees order so that you are no longer required to pay school fees or the order is changed to vary the percentage amount of the school fees you are required to pay under the school fees order Asking the court to capitalise the spousal maintenance payments in the financial court order so instead of ongoing monthly spousal maintenance payment a lump sum is paid as a one off payment Applying to the court to change the mechanics for the sale of the family home if the financial court order included an order that the family home should be sold. Whilst the court won't normally change how much you should receive from the sale proceeds, the court can give directions about the sale price of the family home or say whether an offer should be accepted or say whether the choice of estate agent should be changed or to order that a family law judge can sign the legal paperwork to sell the family home if one owner refuses to do so.   These are the types of clauses contained in a financial court order that can usually be changed either by agreement with your ex-husband or ex-wife or through making an application to vary specific clauses in the financial court order.Covid-19 and changing financial court orders  Given the financial and economic impact of Covid-19 some people want to make more drastic changes to their financial court order and want to know if they can apply to change: An order to transfer the family home into the sole name of their ex-husband or ex-wife as their ex-spouse can no longer secure a mortgage to take over the mortgage liability so they want the family home sold instead An order that the amount of a lump sum payment is reduced to reflect the reduction in the value of the overall family assets because of the drop in the value of investments or in the value of a family business An order that on the sale of the family home the ex-husband or ex-wife will get a fixed amount from the equity in the family home and their ex-spouse will get the balance of the equity An order that one ex-spouse retains cash assets and the other retains more illiquid assets (such as a share portfolio or shares in a family business) that are now either difficult to sell or would have to be sold at a significant undervalue to the value given to the asset at the time that the financial court order was made.   There are many other examples of situations where one spouse now thinks that the financial court order, either made by agreement with their ex-spouse or after a contested court hearing, is now very unfair and prejudicial to them.   Court rules say that although you can apply to vary or change some parts of a financial court order (like the payment of spousal maintenance or the mechanics of the sale of the family home) you can't apply to the court to change the capital elements of the financial court order (such as the amount of a lump sum payment or whether assets should be split differently to that ordered by the court) unless you: Appeal against the financial court order – you can only do this if you can say that the family judge either got the facts or the law wrong. There are time limits in which to appeal against a financial court order Apply to change the financial court order because of a Barder event (including the capital elements of the financial court order). What is a Barder event? A ‘’Barder event’’ is when an unforeseen event invalidates the fundamental assumption on which a financial court order was based. You may therefore think that the family court will treat Covid 19 as a Barder event as none of us, politicians included, realised the significance of the flu like virus in Wuhan when news of the illness was first confirmed by the Chinese authorities on the 31 December 2019.   However for something to be deemed a ‘’Barder event’’ the family court has previously decided that: The event must have occurred after the making of the financial court order The event must invalidate the basis, or the fundamental assumption, on which the financial court order was made The event must have occurred within a short time of the making of the financial court order The application to change the financial court order has to be made reasonably promptly Permission to pursue a Barder case won't prejudice a third party who has bought or acquired an asset that is now the subject of the Barder court application.   The key to making a Barder application is to do it quickly. If you leave things to ‘’see how coronavirus pans out’’ then you may leave it too late to apply to court to change the capital elements of your financial court order. As timing of the Barder application is crucial it is best to take expert family law advice as quickly as possible.Is Covid-19 a Barder event? What amounts to a Barder event is determined by a judge using guidance issued in earlier court of appeal decisions.   In 2008, the court of appeal decided that the global financial crisis and stock market crash was not an unforeseen event because markets fall and rise. Other court cases have said that natural market fluctuations aren’t a Barder event. However, many would argue that a global pandemic, wiping billions off the value of the stock market, was neither natural nor foreseeable back in early December 2019. Whether the impact of Covid 19 on the value of a family business or on an investment portfolio is treated as a Barder event on is yet to be tested but much may depend on the particular personal and financial circumstances of your case and that is why it is best to get expert legal advice.Online family law and maintenance solicitors Cheshire and Manchester based Evolve Family Law solicitors are here to answer all your family law questions whether it is a coronavirus related family law question, child contact, help with leaving an abusive relationship or financial issues arising from coronavirus. If you need advice on aspect of family law call us on 0345 222 8 222 or complete our online enquiry form to set up a video conference or telephone appointment.Latest From Our Divorce Blog:

Coronavirus is making us look at every aspect of our lives, from how we socialise and exercise to how and where we work. With constant talk of hospital admission figures and mortality rates many of you are worried about raising your fears about coronavirus and financial concerns. However, whether you pay or receive either child maintenance or spousal maintenance , payments of maintenance may need to be reviewed and resolved. In this blog we look at child support, spousal maintenance and the impact of coronavirus. Online family law and maintenance solicitors Cheshire and Manchester based Evolve Family Law solicitors are working online to advise existing and new family law clients on all coronavirus related family law questions from child contact, help with leaving an abusive relationship during lockdown or the financial issues arising from Covid 19. If you need legal assistance call us or complete our online enquiry form to set up a video conference or telephone appointment. Coronavirus and spousal maintenance and child support payments When you agree to pay or to receive an amount in spousal maintenance or child support it is often assumed that the amount you are expected to pay, or that you will receive, won't change all that much . However, whether it is spousal maintenance or child support, the amount you pay or receive in financial support can be reviewed either upwards or downwards. Many of you are very worried about coronavirus and your jobs or fear that your income from self-employment will reduce drastically (if not disappear altogether) over the next few months. Whilst the government has assured us all that financial help is at hand, for both the employed and the self-employed, there are reports that people are confused about the eligibility rules for government help and are worried about how they can pay spousal maintenance or child support now.   If you are the person who is receiving the maintenance payment it is equally worrying as many feel that they are in an impossible position, having taken out mortgages and financial commitments, on the basis of promised or ordered spousal maintenance or child support.   Spousal maintenance orders and Covid-19 Spousal maintenance is either paid on a voluntary basis between husband and wife or civil partner or under a spousal maintenance court order.   If you are paying or receiving spousal maintenance under a court order then the first thing that you should look at is the wording of the financial court order and the spousal maintenance clause. If you are in any doubt about the wording or meaning of the spousal maintenance clause then it is best to take legal advice.   There are a number of ways in which spousal maintenance court orders can require the payment of spousal maintenance, such as: Joint lives spousal maintenance – spousal maintenance is payable until the death or the re-marriage of the person receiving the spousal maintenance payments Time limited spousal maintenance – spousal maintenance is paid for a set period of time and then stops on a date specified in the court order. In some cases, the person receiving the spousal maintenance can apply to extend the length of time that spousal maintenance is paid for but they have to apply to court to extend the length of time that spousal maintenance is paid for prior to the expiry of the order. In other court orders the spousal maintenance is said to be time limited with no option to extend the length of time that it is paid for.   Can spousal maintenance orders be changed? Spousal maintenance orders can be changed by court order or by agreement. If your financial circumstances have changed because of coronavirus and you are paying or receiving spousal maintenance the government is urging you to try to reach an agreement with your ex-partner over spousal maintenance.   Family law solicitors say that whilst it is important, if possible, to reach an agreement over changes in spousal maintenance payments any agreement should be temporary or a holding agreement until the Covid 19 position is clearer.   Every family situation is different so you may need specialist legal advice on what to do about spousal maintenance payments. Some payments may need to stop and others may need to reduce or increase. Here are two case examples: A dentist is no longer able to work but because he has an employer who is continuing to pay him then the spousal maintenance can continue at the same rate for the time being. The spousal maintenance might need to reduce or stop if the employer is forced to stop the dentist’s salary or the salary is reduced to the cap set by the government coronavirus income scheme A National Health Service consultant is not affected financially by Covid 19 but his ex-wife has lost her job in the travel industry. Depending on her circumstances her spousal maintenance may need to increase on a temporary basis until she can get another job. If her spousal maintenance is a time limited order she may need to ask the court to extend the period of the spousal maintenance court order.   Tips on how to change spousal maintenance payments by agreement In these highly unusual times the focus is on working together. That is the message that the government is giving when it comes to sorting out the changes to child care , spousal maintenance or child support that are required because of coronavirus. Tips on how to change spousal maintenance payments by agreement include:   Communicate with your ex either directly, through a trusted friend or your family solicitor. If you don’t tell your ex what is going on and be upfront about how Covid-19 has affected you financially then they will expect the spousal maintenance payments to continue Provide paperwork – family law solicitors say there is often an element of mistrust between separated spouses and so if you want your ex-spouse to agree to a reduction in spousal maintenance you will need to provide the supporting paperwork to show that you have lost your job or that your hours have been reduced or a bonus scheme scrapped Reflect on any discussions with your ex and don’t be rushed into making long term decisions. After all your ex-spouse may get a new job or the government scheme may mean that their income isn’t as badly affected as first thought. You should not agree to any major changes in the spousal maintenance order or agree to the cessation of payments and cancellation of the spousal maintenance order without first taking legal advice Record your agreement – if you are able to reach a spousal maintenance agreement with your ex-spouse then you need to record the agreement in case one of you changes your mind. If there is no clear recorded agreement then your ex could apply to court to enforce the spousal maintenance order and ask for payment of arrears of spousal maintenance. They may not be successful in that court application if there is a clear agreement drawn up by you (or your solicitors) that spousal maintenance is being changed temporarily and the reasons why and when spousal maintenance will be reviewed again, for example, if the payer gets a new job or a government income subsidy Understand the court options- it is important to know that if your ex-spouse won't agree to a reduction or temporary stopping of spousal maintenance what your legal options are. You could apply to court to vary the spousal maintenance order to reduce or stop the payments. Your ex-spouse could apply to court for payment of arrears of spousal maintenance and to enforce the spousal maintenance order. The court decision would be based on all the circumstances of your case and the ability of the paying person to pay spousal maintenance. If you are upfront with the paperwork relating to the change in income this may make a court application to formally vary the spousal maintenance order unnecessary. [related_posts] Can child maintenance be changed? Covid-19 and the financial fallout and economic downturn will affect child support payments as well as spousal maintenance orders. In most families child support is either paid as a voluntary arrangement between you and your ex-partner or under a child maintenance service assessment. It is rare for there to be a child support court order as the court only has limited jurisdiction to make child support orders.   Again family law solicitors are recommending that parents talk to one another about child maintenance and to see whether the child support needs to be changed because of a change in the payer’s financial circumstances. If the payments are made under a child maintenance service assessment then you may need to ask the agency to carry out a new assessment. Online family law and maintenance solicitors Cheshire and Manchester based Evolve Family Law solicitors are here to answer all your family law questions whether it is a coronavirus related family law question, child contact, help with leaving an abusive relationship or financial issues arising from coronavirus. If you legal help call us or complete our online enquiry form to set up a video conference or telephone appointment.

If you are in an abusive relationship then you may think that during the coronavirus outbreak there is no help available and that you’re ‘’on your own’’. Although all this talk of self-isolation and social distancing may make you feel like that, the message from family law solicitors is that ‘’you are not alone’’. There is help available during the coronavirus outbreak if you are in an abusive relationship. In this blog we look at your legal options if you are caught up in an abusive relationship and need help to get out of it during the coronavirus outbreak. Online domestic violence and family law solicitors Although law offices may be closed because of Covid-19, Cheshire and Manchester based Evolve Family Law solicitors are working online to support those at risk of domestic violence needing help to leave an abusive relationship during the Covid-19 lockdown. If you need legal assistance call us or complete our online enquiry form to set up a video conference or telephone appointment. Coping in abusive relationships during the coronavirus outbreak If your partner is abusive towards you then it is difficult enough to cope when life is ‘’normal’’. For many the fact that partners are now either working from home or not able to work, and so are based at home full time, is particularly hard. There is no escape from home for you to visit friends or family or go off to work.   Tensions can also be increased by your partner’s health or financial anxieties about Covid-19, their lack of ability to go to the pub or to the gym to meet up with their friends and the presence of the children twenty four hours a day at the family home.   The government has said that it wants Covid-19 to bring out ‘’the best in us’’. That is a laudable aim but sadly domestic violence organisations and family law solicitors know that, for some families, domestic abuse may increase because of having to spend so much time with a partner. Alternatively, partners who haven’t previously been abusive may snap and either lash out or become very coercive and controlling.   When you hear that the police are cracking down on people leaving their homes it may make you reluctant to leave or seek help from domestic violence organisations or family law solicitors but, coronavirus or not, if you are in an abusive relationship you should seek help.   Those people who are contacting us about abusive partners are often reluctant to acknowledge the extent of the abuse and prefer to minimise some of the partner’s behaviour, especially if it falls short of physical violence and involves coercive control such as: Dictating what you can eat Saying when you can watch the TV and what programmes you can watch Checking your mobile phone or internet usage Restricting when or if you can go out for your daily exercise or for essentials like food shopping Forcing you to have sex Not allowing you any freedom within your house by insisting on being in the same room as you Listening into your phone calls to friends and family.   As the restrictions on the movement of people continues in force because of the Covid-19 pandemic  the sort of coercive controlling behaviour that you could cope with when one or both of you were out working can become intolerable. However, there is help available.   Help if you are in an abusive relationship The police, domestic violence organisations, the family courts and online family law solicitors are continuing to offer help to those trapped in an abusive relationship.   If you or your children are at risk of immediate harm then you should call the police. The police understand that the risks of domestic violence are increased during the current crisis. They may be able to arrest your partner. If the situation is so serious that you can't wait for the police to arrive you can leave with your children as the authorities will accept that leaving an abusive relationship is an emergency and that is an exception to the requirement to stay indoors.   In addition to the police there are various domestic violence organisations who are open and available to help and offer support: The National Domestic Violence Helpline – 0808 2000 247 The Men’s Advice Line – 0808 801 0327 The Mix, information and support for under 25s in the UK – 0808 808 4994 The National LGBT+ Domestic Abuse Helpline – 0800 999 5428 The Samaritans – 116 123   In addition to police and domestic violence organisation help the family court and domestic violence solicitors are open to help you if you need court protection in the form of an injunction order. [related_posts] Injunctions against domestic violence during the Covid-19 outbreak You may have read that most courts and public offices are closed. Whilst that is correct the family courts are open for remote emergency hearings including applications for: Non-molestation injunction orders Occupation orders Emergency child arrangements orders and other types of children orders to safeguard and protect children.   Therefore, if you are in an abusive relationship, there is help available from the family court. Don’t worry that you may not be able to get to see a family law solicitor. Even prior to the coronavirus outbreak many family law and domestic violence solicitors were used to taking instructions by phone appointment or video conference and used to conducting court hearings remotely.   That isn’t to say that things are a bit of a challenge but if you need help then both the court and family law solicitors are just a phone call away.   If you need protection then a family law injunction order may be your best option. There are two types of family law injunction order: A non-molestation order – to stop your partner from being physically violent or aggressive or verbally abusive or exerting coercive control over you An occupation order – to stop your partner from returning to the family home (if he/she has left but is threatening to return to the family home) or to make your partner leave the family home or to restrict him/her to certain parts of the family home.   The court and family law solicitors also recognise that you might need help if you are living with extended family and are being subjected to domestic violence or coercive control or that you may need help with your children and need the security of a children order, such as A child arrangements order A specific issue order A prohibited steps order.   It is often the case that people suffer in silence when they live with an abusive partner or they think that what they are coping with isn’t ‘’bad enough’’ to get help. Since the Covid 19 rules on restriction of movement have come in many have thought that they are trapped in an abusive relationship for the duration of lockdown. Domestic violence organisations, the police, courts and family law solicitors are saying that domestic violence and abusive behaviour isn’t right in any circumstances and that if you need help then call. Online family law solicitors The specialist family lawyers at Evolve Family Law can help you if you are in an abusive relationship and you need legal help. Call us or complete our online enquiry form for a video conference or telephone appointment.

​When most of us see headlines about compensation we think that the newsworthy case must be a civil claim for compensation arising out of a road traffic accident or medical negligence. However, in the news last week was a case on ‘divorce compensation’. In this blog we look at what is meant by divorce compensation.Cheshire Divorce solicitors If you are in the process of a separation or divorce and want advice on a financial settlement then the family law team at Evolve Family Law can help you. Specialising in complex financial settlement claims and children proceedings, the friendly and approachable divorce solicitors, based at Holmes Chapel Cheshire and Whitefield North Manchester, can help you. Call us on 0345 222 8 222 or contact us online.​Divorce compensation Divorce compensation is in all the newspapers because of a case involving two solicitors.  The couple had been married for about ten years and have two children together. The family wealth amounts to about ten million. The family judge ordered that the husband and wife should each get fifty percent, around five million each.   You may think that £5 million each is a just and fair award as after all the couple had been married for nearly a decade. However, the judge went onto order that the wife should get an extra £400,000 for what was termed by the judge as ‘relationship generated disadvantage’ or divorce compensation.   The judge made the additional £400,000 award because the wife and mother, a Cambridge law graduate, had sacrificed her career as a solicitor to look after the couple’s two children.   The court decision will be of interest to many as it is common for one partner in a relationship to step back from their career to become a house husband or wife or to try to juggle child care and home making with a part time career, thus losing out on job promotions and work bonuses. Often the philosophy is that either a husband or wife has to step back from their career as if they equally share the childcare commitment both careers will suffer.    In some family situations, where one spouse has a lower earnings capacity than the other, the choice may be painfully obvious as to who should take on the role of the main breadwinner. However, in the reported case both husband and wife started out their married life as qualified solicitors and both (rather than one) could have had stellar careers had it not been for the decision to forgo a career to look after the couple’s children.   Can I get divorce compensation? When a case hits the headlines many people, lawyers included, think that divorce  compensation will be the ‘new thing’ and that everyone will be claiming for relationship generated disadvantage. However, the judge in the recent court case, made it clear in his ruling that his decision in the case of the two unnamed lawyers should not open the floodgates to a plethora of relationship generated disadvantage divorce compensation claims. The judge said that relationship generated disadvantage claims should be limited to where there are truly exceptional circumstances.   How do I claim for relationship generated disadvantage? Compensation for relationship-generated disadvantage can be included as part of your financial claim in divorce financial proceedings. You cannot claim for relationship generated disadvantage if you are in a cohabiting relationship.   The relationship generated disadvantage claim is made as part of your financial settlement claims and assessed at the same time as the judge decides on: What the family assets are What your needs and your spouse’s needs are (and if you have children what your children’s needs are) How your family assets should be divided between you Whether you should get the family home or if it should be transferred to your spouse as part of the financial settlement or sold and the proceeds divided between you Whether you or your spouse should receive a share of the other’s pension as part of the financial settlement Whether a clean break order should be made to prevent further financial claims Whether spousal maintenance should be paid and, if so, for how long and how much should be paid.   There are a host of other things that a judge has to consider such as whether one spouse should pay towards the other’s legal costs or not.   Any claim for divorce compensation or relationship generated disadvantage will be added to the list of issues for the judge to rule on and to explain why he/she has allowed an additional award for relationship generated disadvantage or ruled it out in their court judgment.   In the case of the two solicitors it was clearly evident that the wife had given up a lucrative career to care for children and that she had a case to say, that with her qualifications, she could have enjoyed an equally stellar career as her husband had it not been for the fact that the arrival of children seriously damaged her ability to work in a demanding career as a solicitor.   You may take the view that with a financial settlement of around five million the wife did not need the extra £400,000 for ‘relationship generated disadvantage’ as the five million would more than meet her reasonable needs. However, the court has said in previous cases where divorce compensation arguments have been raised, that relationship generated disadvantage is relevant even if their future needs have been met generously through the financial settlement. That is because one spouse has given up their ability to generate an income surplus to needs and so in an exceptional case they can ask a judge to rule that their husband or wife should pay an element of ‘divorce compensation’.Cheshire Divorce solicitors  If you are separating or getting divorced and are worried about your financial settlement then whether or not you gave up your career you need expert legal advice on your best financial settlement options.   The family law team at Evolve Family Law can help you. Specialising in complex financial settlement claims and children law proceedings the friendly and approachable divorce solicitors, based at Holmes Chapel Cheshire and Whitefield North Manchester, can help you reach a financial settlement that works for you and your family. Call us on 0345 222 8 222 or contact us online . ​Latest From Our Divorce Blog:

By guest blogger Anoushka Macin of Balance Psychologies You have decided or it may have been decided for you that you no longer want to stay in a relationship that is tormenting you. Leaving a narcissistic relationship is one of the hardest things to do. In my work with clients and with my online community I provide lots of information to people who find themselves with a narcissist or toxic individual. Here is how to get out safely with your wellbeing intact.   When we fall in love it’s natural to attach and form a romantic bond, but once in love with a narcissist it is not easy to leave let alone detach from them.   Why it’s hard to break up with a narcissist Pathological narcissists or people with narcissistic traits present as charming, interesting and seductive to be around and will treat you with kindness and warmth. They may even love bomb you. This is where the dysfunctional attachment to the narcissist begins. I am not saying that it is wrong that you are being treated with kindness, charm and respect at the beginning. Of course you want to be with them but you become easily dependent on their attention and validation of you.   Once you are hooked onto this they become secure and then they aren’t motivated to be nice to you. Their charm, warmth and respect fades and is replaced or intermixed with varying degrees of criticism, demands, coldness and emotional abuse. You become accommodating and try to win their love and attention back and meanwhile your self-esteem and independence of mind are compromised. You may even become gas lighted and begin to doubt your own decisions and perceptions due to blame and lies. When you question this you become attacked, intimidated and confused by manipulation.   Over time you learn to accept the abuse or even attempt to avoid conflict and become deferential. Because facing the reality is too painful. To leave is the only option as this behavior becomes a cycle of abuse and unfortunately you are too weak and vulnerable to be able to do anything about it. You cannot save them, only yourself. Below are some tips and strategies that may help you to cope and heal after leaving a narcissistic relationship.   Go no contact - limited no contact Block them! I mean of all your communication avenues. That means phone, email and social media. You need some time to yourself to ‘breathe’ and get your thoughts in order. You are not going to be able to do that if you have constant abuse through secondary sources. The narcissist will try to contact you! You have to cut off this communication, you need some time to get your mind in order.   Now, this may not be as straight forward if there are children involved, so what I suggest here is limited contact. I feel that at the beginning of this process do go no contact but only when you are ready begin with limited contact and it needs to stay like that. So, what does limited contact look like? It will mean that you have to clarify what it is that you are communicating with the narcissist, be specific and stick to only the facts that you want to get across. Take the emotion out of the content that you are talking about, this will give you the advantage. Please know that the narcissist will use your triggers and emotions against you to trip you up and get what they want. As these interactions are about gaining power over you and controlling the  conversation, to do that they need to initiate an emotional reaction out of you and will press your buttons. Be wise to this and prepare yourself accordingly.   Join a support group It is really important at this time that you have support of people that understand and care for you. Having to explain your decisions to people who do not get it, is not good for you to be around them at the moment. You need to surround yourself with people who give you positive validation. Finding a therapist might be a good idea too.   Become more autonomous To heal and move forward from an abusive relationship it is helpful to build a life outside of the relationship that includes separate friends, hobbies and other interests. When you leave you will need a fulfilling life to supplement or replace the relationship. You will need to surround yourself with positive things that will help you to heal and remind you that there is a life outside of this person and relationship.   Build your self esteem This is very important, you will need all the strength that you need. It is important to reconnect with yourself and get to know you all over again. In relationships such as these your identity would have been compromised and diminished, therefore reconnecting to your own needs and values is important to build your inner strength. You will need to learn to become more assertive and build boundaries.   Learn how to nurture yourself This follows on from the last point of reconnecting with yourself. Learning your needs and putting them first. This is really important if you have children as you will be teaching them to value themselves and to build a robust connection to self. This is a life skill and will insulate you from the abuse.   Grieve Please allow yourself time to grieve the relationship and false future promises that were made to you in the relationship. This will help you to process your emotions and recover from the relationship. I would also urge you to find an experienced Manchester divorce solicitor who has the understanding and experience of dealing with narcissistic personalities. Mediation is not a good option where there is a history of abuse.   As long as you’re under the spell of the narcissist, they have control over you. In order to become empowered you will need to educate yourself. Come out denial and see the reality of what this really is. Information is power. Read up on narcissism and abuse, I have a lot of information on my website. Regardless of your decision, it is important for your own mental health and to redeem your autonomy and self-esteem. By guest blogger Anoushka Macin of Balance Psychologies [related_posts]

A divorce court ruling on a Sharia law marriage has called into question the validity of Sharia law marriages conducted in the UK.  You may question why that is important to you as, after all, if you celebrated an Islamic marriage ceremony, witnessed by all your friends and family that is what counts as you are married in the eyes of God. Whilst our Manchester divorce solicitors would not disagree with the significance of the marriage ceremony to you, in the English family court you may not be legally married. Your status as a husband or wife or as a cohabitee could make the difference between whether you get half the family wealth or nothing if you separate. The case of Mr Khan and Mrs Akhtar The legal status of Islamic marriage in the UK is in the news headlines again because of the long running case of Mr Khan and Mrs Akhtar. In the high court Mrs Akhtar sought a divorce from her husband, Mr Khan. He opposed the divorce petition on the basis that they weren’t legally married. Although you would have thought it obvious that they were married because the couple had participated in a Nikah ceremony in a London restaurant conducted by an Imam with about 150 guests, Mr Khan said the marriage  wasn’t legal as whilst it might be a legal marriage under Sharia law it did not meet the requirements of English marriage  law.   The first judge ruled that the marriage was a marriage but classed it as a void marriage. This decision allowed Mrs Akhtar to start financial proceedings as the wife of Mr Khan, something that she could not have done if the high court had ruled that the couple were not legally married. Although the court ruled that the marriage was still a marriage (even though it was void) back in 2018 it has taken until February 2020 for the court of appeal to hear the case and conclude that the couple were not legally married under English law.   Interestingly the appeal wasn’t brought by Mr Khan but by the Attorney General who is joined as a party to court proceedings where the validity of a marriage is called into question. The court of appeal ruling is making Manchester divorce solicitors ask where the decision leaves Mr Khan, Mrs Akhtar and their four children and, just as importantly all those other husband and wife's who have celebrated a Nikah marriage  ceremony recognised in Sharia and Islamic law but not under UK marriage  law.   Is an Islamic marriage valid in the UK? The court of appeal held that the marriage of Mr Khan and Mrs Akhter was invalid (rather than void) and therefore the Islamic marriage isn’t a legally recognised marriage, notwithstanding the 150 guests who attended to witness the marriage ceremony.   The court of appeal ruled that the Sharia law wedding wasn’t a valid marriage because the ceremony took place at a venue that isn’t registered as a wedding venue and therefore no registrar was therefore present to conduct the ceremony. Back in 2018, the high court took a different approach and ruled there was a valid marriage recognised in both Sharia law and under English case law because although the couple hadn’t complied with English marriage law requirements they both held themselves out as a married couple. The court of appeal said that this wasn’t enough as they both knew that they needed to participate in a registered civil marriage ceremony to comply with English marriage law. [related_posts] Does it matter if your Islamic marriage isn’t recognised in the UK? You may question whether it matters if your Islamic marriage isn’t recognised in the UK family law as a valid marriage because, from your perspective, it is your marriage under Sharia law that is the important ceremony to you and your family. However, if you separate and you try to start divorce proceedings you may find yourself in the same position as Mrs Akhtar; told that there is no need for English divorce proceedings because you are not legally married under English law. That means, that for the purposes of your financial settlement, in English family law you will be treated as a cohabitee or unmarried partner.   If your marriage is legally recognised then within divorce and financial proceedings a husband or wife can bring financial claims for a share of: The family home Any other property you own – this property includes houses or commercial property owned in your joint names or in your sole name Your business – your spouse does not need to hold shares in your company or to have worked in the business to be able to make a financial claim against business assets Your pension – your spouse can claim a share in your pension even if your pension was set up prior to your marriage Your savings and investments – your husband or wife can claim a share of your savings and investments even if they are owned in your sole name Your income – a claim can be made for the payment of ongoing spousal maintenance.   By contrast, if you are an unmarried partner or cohabitee you won't be able to claim: A share of your partner’s pension Spousal maintenance Any other assets unless you can prove that you are an owner of that property or that you were promised a share in the property.   If you have children with your partner you can try to claim housing provision and child support for your children but Manchester divorce solicitors say it is a lot harder to bring a financial claim if you are a cohabitee rather than a husband or wife whose legal status in recognised in English law.   What should I do if I have an Islamic marriage? If you have an Islamic marriage and you are concerned that your marriage won’t be legally recognised in English law it is best to take legal advice from a Manchester divorce solicitor. A discussion about your legal relationship status does not commit you to making any decisions and is completely confidential.   Islamic marriages and prenuptial agreements If your husband or wife does not want to participate in a legally recognised marriage ceremony because they appreciate the extent of the financial claims that can be made by a husband or wife on separation (in contrast to an unmarried partner) then one option may be to look at signing a prenuptial agreement to record a fair financial settlement should you separate at a later date. It is vital that you take expert legal advice before committing to sign a prenuptial agreement.     If you are concerned about the status of your Islamic marriage then whether or not you are contemplating a separation or starting civil divorce proceedings you should take legal advice on your situation and options. The specialist divorce law team at Manchester divorce solicitors at Evolve Family Law in Whitefield can help you. Call our Whitefield divorce solicitors or complete our online enquiry form.

For many Jewish women the prospect of getting divorced not only makes them worry about how their children will cope, raises fear for their future financial security but makes them question whether they will end up in limbo, with a civil law decree absolute of divorce from the Manchester divorce court but no religious Get. A new case may bring hope to those worried about securing a Get after their separation and civil divorce.Manchester divorce solicitors If you are divorcing and are worried about securing a Get or about negotiating the childcare arrangements for your children or your divorce financial settlement then the Manchester divorce solicitors at Evolve Family Law in Whitefield can help you. Call us on 0345 222 8 222, complete our online enquiry form or email robin@evolvefamilylaw.co.uk Whitefield based Evolve Family Law solicitors are approachable and friendly, providing pragmatic expert divorce advice, financial settlement solutions and children law resolutions. Call us on 0345 222 8 222 and let the Whitefield divorce solicitors help you.Obtaining a Get The law has tried to help those trapped having secured separation or a civil divorce but unable to move on with their lives because they are not able to secure a religious divorce or Get. In what is being described as a landmark case, a woman has used legislation designed to protect victims of domestic violence to secure her Get. In this blog we look at how she achieved her Get and the alternatives to her course of action.   Obtaining a Get by private prosecution An unnamed women from London obtained her Get after launching a private criminal prosecution against her husband for coercive control.   The case is thought to be the first time that the UK criminal justice system has been used as a means to secure a Get to enable the London woman to be able to remarry according to Jewish law.   If you are wondering about what the judge and jury said, this is a case where the private prosecution of the husband was withdrawn when he agreed to give his wife a Get. That meant his crown court trial didn’t take place and therefore the jury did not have to assess whether the man was guilty or innocent of the law against ‘coercive control’.   The wife used Section 76 of the Serious Crime Act 2015 to bring the private prosecution. The 2015 Act created a new offence of coercive or controlling behaviour in an intimate or family relationship. An offence is committed if: A person repeatedly or continuously engages in behaviour towards another person that is controlling or coercive and the two people are personally connected The person committing the behaviour knows or ought to know that their behaviour will have a serious impact and the behaviour does have a serious impact on the person subjected to the behaviour.   To be charged with an offence under the 2015 Act you must have committed controlling or coercive behaviour towards a ‘personally connected’ person. The law says you are personally connected if: You are in an intimate personal relationship or You live together and are family members or You lived together and were in an intimate personal relationship with one another.    Had the husband been found guilty of the criminal charge then he could have faced a maximum sentence of up to five years in prison. That was probably a very powerful motive to agree to give the wife a Get. However, some may argue that the Get was not freely given by the husband as he felt under pressure to provide the Get rather than offering it of his own free will.   Obtaining a Get through injunction proceedings  In the London case a private criminal prosecution was launched but the case is making Manchester divorce solicitors question whether a Jewish woman could apply for a civil or family court order alleging coercive control as a means to try and secure co-operation and the granting of the Get.   Many women assume that they cannot apply for a family court injunction order because their husband has not been violent towards them, or if he has it was ‘just a push or a slap’. The law on domestic violence is clear, domestic abuse includes emotional and psychological abuse as well as coercive and controlling behaviour. In addition, any form of domestic violence is unacceptable.   Accordingly, some women may want to consider if injunction proceedings would help provide leverage to secure their Get, in the same way that the wife used her private criminal prosecution to achieve her goal of freedom and an end to her being in legal limbo.   Obtaining a Get through UK divorce law For a wife who wants to secure a Get but their husband is not co-operating the most widely known legal option is to use Section 10A of the Matrimonial Causes Act 1973, amended by the Divorce (Religious Marriages) Act 2002).   Under this legislation either a husband or wife is entitled to apply to the divorce court for an order stopping the decree absolute of divorce from being pronounced until the Get is obtained.   In another recent court case, spousal maintenance law was used as a means to achieve a Get. A Manchester businessman appealed against a financial court order made in divorce court proceedings. The court had ordered him to pay spousal maintenance at the rate of £1,850 a month until he gave his wife a Get.   The husband, Mr Moher, appealed saying it was wrong to order him to pay spousal maintenance until he gave his wife a Get because it introduced compulsion and, under Jewish law, a Get should be given of your own free will. The court of appeal disagreed and upheld the spousal maintenance order.   Talk to your divorce solicitor If you need a Get then it is important that you tell your Manchester divorce solicitor this so that they know, in any negotiations, just how important the Get is to you and to your future happiness.   Once your Manchester divorce solicitor understands that you need the Get to re-marry under Jewish law and to have more children then this should be a priority for them. Even if your husband says he will cooperate and give you a Get or you do not contemplate re-marriage, it is still important to record the agreement on securing a Get in case your husband decides not to co-operate.   Robin Charrot, divorce and financial settlement solicitor at Evolve Family Law based in Whitefield, Manchester says:   ‘’ Obtaining a Get can sometimes be hard work when a husband refuses to cooperate or prevaricates. It is vital that your divorce solicitor understands the importance of the Get to you. I have had solicitors question why it is significant to obtain a Get if a wife has achieved a civil UK law divorce as well as sorted out a child arrangements order and her divorce financial settlement. From my perspective, if a client wants Get it means the difference between a wife being able to get over her divorce and move on with her life feeling positive about her future and feeling trapped and forever controlled by her former husband. That is why the Get is so important and why the London landmark private prosecution will generate a lot of interest in Whitefield and North Manchester. It is another option to explore to secure your Get.’’Manchester Divorce solicitors If you are contemplating a separation or starting civil divorce proceedings but are worried about obtaining a Get then Manchester divorce solicitors at Evolve Family Law in Whitefield can help you. Call the Whitefield divorce solicitor us on 0345 222 8 222, complete our online enquiry form or email robin@evolvefamilylaw.co.uk   Whitefield based Evolve Family Law solicitors are approachable and friendly, providing pragmatic expert divorce, children and financial settlement law advice. Call Evolve Family Law on 0345 222 8 222 and let us help you.Latest From Our Marriage & Divorce Blogs:

When it comes to pension rights and answering the question ‘do I have to share my pension if I divorce,’ the frustrating response to hear from a Manchester divorce solicitor is that there isn’t a yes or no answer to your pension rights question. In this blog we look at just how complicated it can be to unravel pension rights on divorce and answer some of the common questions that are raised by husbands or wives worried about the thought of having to share their pension on divorce.   Pension and divorce experts Our Manchester divorce solicitors are often told by husbands or wives that their pension can't be shared on the breakdown of their relationship for a whole variety of reasons including: The pension can't be touched until I retire so can't be shared now The pension was started before the marriage The pension is linked to the family business You can't share a final salary pension on divorce The pension isn’t valuable enough to share on divorce My employer won't let me share my work pension on divorce Pensions can't be shared if you are in a civil partnership and not married.   All of those are wrong! If you start off on ‘the wrong foot’ with misinformation about pension rights on divorce it is very easy to either: Believe your pension can't be touched and therefore be unwilling to negotiate on pension rights and divorce Assume that your husband or wife's pension can't be worth much and is incapable of being divided or shared until you both reach retirement age.   To avoid reaching fixed views on pension rights and divorce it is best to take early legal advice from Manchester divorce solicitors and financial advice so you know where you stand legally and financially. Early advice means neither of you should have entrenched pension positions and be more open to negotiating a financial settlement that may or may not involve sharing pensions.   Joint pensions Many husband and wife's assume that their pension is a joint pension with their spouse. A Manchester divorce solicitor or financial advisor will tell you that a pension is only legally owned by one party so technically the pension will belong to you or to your spouse. Even though you may or may not own the pension, on divorce most pensions are capable of being shared so that the non-owning husband or wife gets a share of the pension.   Pensions can be a complex topic as there are so many different types of pension. You may be adamant that your pension is joint with your husband or wife because: You are both shareholders and company directors in a family business and have a pension linked to the business You both set up private pension schemes at the same time You have property or land owned in a pension fund.   No pension is a jointly legally owned asset. Even if you and your spouse both have funds in a SIPP or own a business property within a pension fund you will both have individual shares in the pension pot.   Although pensions are not joint assets because they are not legally owned by both of you they will normally be taken into account in any divorce financial settlement and can be shared or the pension value offset against the value of other family assets. Are pensions ever ignored in divorce financial settlements? In most separations and divorces pensions are not ignored in the divorce financial settlement. That is because the pension is often the most valuable asset after the equity in the family home.   There are a few limited family scenarios where the value of the pension won't feature highly, for example: A young couple with no children A very short marriage with no prior period of cohabitation before marriage and no children A marriage where the husband and wife agreed to ignore the value of pension assets if they separated or divorced by signing a prenuptial agreement or a postnuptial agreement. This is OK if the terms of the prenuptial agreement or postnuptial agreement meets the needs of the husband and wife.   Are pensions always shared equally? Pension assets may not be shared at all, for example, you may agree or the family court may order that one of you gets a bigger share of other assets, such as the equity in the family home or savings.   If you do agree to a pension share or the financial court order includes a pension sharing order then your husband or wife could get a percentage from one to a hundred percent of your pension fund.   The court is more likely to make a financial court order that includes pension sharing where: The value of the pension funds makes it worthwhile to share the pension. If the pension only has a small value then the administrative costs of sharing the pension may not be justified There are sufficient assets to not require one of you to need to receive all or the majority of the equity in the family home to rehouse yourself and to offset the value of the pension.   Even if you and your spouse or the family court orders that a pension is split equally between husband and wife that doesn’t necessarily mean that you will both get the same amount of pension income from your equal share of the pension fund. The pension income differential can be down to age or gender. That is why many Manchester divorce solicitors and family courts prefer to arrange for pensions to be shared to achieve equality of pension income on retirement rather than a straight equal division of the capital value of the pension fund.   How to value a pension in a divorce financial settlement It is often thought by a husband or wife that valuing a pension in divorce and financial settlement proceedings is easy as you can just rely on the annual statement that pension administrators provide. Most of these annual pension statements will include what is said to be the ‘cash transfer value’ of the pension fund.   If the fund value of the pension is accurate then you may think it is a straight forward process to either agree a pension offsetting figure (the amount that one of you will receive for not getting a share of the pension) or agree the percentage of the pension share. However, the cash transfer value of a pension can be wildly inaccurate or misleading. For example, two pensions may both have a cash transfer value of £500,000. You would assume therefore that as both pensions are worth the same amount they will produce the same pension income on retirement. That’s not the case because one pension may be a final salary pension and the other a personal pension or a SIPP.   Getting expert legal advice and actuarial pension advice can be crucial in helping you: Accurately value your pension assets Reach a fair financial settlement.   Can I ring fence my pension and leave it out of the financial settlement? Manchester divorce solicitors are often asked if pensions can be kept out of divorce financial settlements. Even if you both agree to ignore the value of a pension the asset still needs to be disclosed. A husband and wife are under a duty to provide full financial disclosure. Failure to give information about your pension isn’t in your interests. If you do not disclose an asset then any agreement or financial court order could potentially be overturned at a later date because of the lack of full and accurate financial disclosure.   It therefore pays to disclose the existence of all assets, including pensions, even if you and your spouse chose to ignore the value of the pension in your financial settlement negotiations.   Many husband's and wife's struggle with the idea that the value of their pension may not be ignored in the financial settlement, even though: They started the pension before the marriage and all the pension contributions were made prior to the marriage Their pension is in payment Their spouse is in a new relationship and so they don’t think that he/she needs a share of their pension They signed a prenuptial agreement to say that the value of a pension would be ignored.   Whilst all of the above point are very valid, a family court looks at a range of factors when deciding whether or not to make a pension sharing order as part of a financial settlement. For example, the court will look at both a husband's and wife's needs including pension income needs but will also factor in the length of your marriage, your ages and any pre-marriage contributions or wealth and the existence of any prenuptial agreement or postnuptial agreement.     When is a pension shared? Many husband's and wife's are very keen to avoid a financial settlement that includes a pension sharing order because they mistakenly believe that their spouse will continue to receive the benefit of their hard work and ongoing pension contributions and pension growth from the date of the financial settlement until eventual retirement and pension draw down. That isn’t the case.   If you agree to your pension being shared or the court makes a pension sharing order after a contested financial settlement court hearing then: The pension sharing order will be implemented after the pension administrators receive the financial court order, pension sharing order annex and the decree absolute of divorce. The pension administrator has four months from receipt of the relevant paperwork to implement the pension sharing order Once the pension sharing order has been implemented there will be two separate pension pots (assuming there isn’t a one hundred percent pension sharing order) and any future pension contributions made by you after the order has been implemented will be credited against your pension pot and you will get the benefit of all the pension and investment growth in your pension pot In most cases you will be able to decide when to take your pension completely independently of when your former husband or wife choses to retire and get the pension income from their share of the pension. The position is more complicated if your pension pot consists of property and is a Self-invested pension plans (SIPPs) or is a Small self-administered schemes (SSASs). It is also sensible to take detailed advice about the earliest date you will be able to take the pension income as the pension rules may be different for you and your former spouse and it is best to be fully informed before agreeing to a pension sharing order.   [related_posts] Should I pension share or pension offset? The question of whether you should pension share or offset is really down to your priorities. However, if you are not able to reach a financial settlement with your husband or wife by agreement then the decision over whether to pension share or pension offset may be taken out of your hands as a family judge will decide how your assets , including pensions, should be divided.   If you agree to a pension offset then the value of the pension is offset against other assets owned jointly or individually. This may be vital to you if your priority is to stay in the family home or to keep your shareholding in the family business or family farm. Equally, it can be short sighted to ‘put all your eggs in one basket’ and just get equity in the family home rather than a share of your spouse’s pension.   You may think that, in time, you can downsize and get money out of the family home to fund your retirement. However, the cash from the sale of a family home may not generate anywhere near as much in pension income as a share in your spouse’s final salary pension scheme would have.   Alternatively, you may be adamant that you want to keep one hundred percent of your pension because you realise just how valuable your National Health Service, police, fire service or final salary pension is in comparison to the income you could realistically generate from the pension offsetting figure. However, you may benefit from reality testing your plan to keep all your pension and get less or no equity from the family home as that may mean you struggle to rehouse yourself so you are asset poor and pension rich. All very well for the future, but does it mean you will have a tough time of it until your hoped for retirement and is it worth it?   When it comes to pensions and divorce financial settlements there are always choices to be made, from how you value the pension to whether you share or offset the pension. Taking expert legal advice from Manchester divorce solicitors can help you make informed choices, looking at the short and long term needs of you and your family.   Whitefield based Evolve Family Law solicitors are approachable and friendly, providing pragmatic expert divorce, pension and financial settlement solutions. Contact us today and let us help you.