Child custody and contact is a tricky topic whatever the legal status of the parents of a child. For example, the parents could be unmarried and have never lived together, be a former cohabiting couple, married or divorced or in a civil partnership. In this blog we look at who has custody of a child when the parents aren’t married. Who has custody of a child? UK children law doesn’t give a parent custody of their child automatically by virtue of being a parent, whether you are an unmarried or married parent. However, if custody is in dispute, either parent can apply to court for a child arrangements order.   A child arrangements order is a bit like the old custody and contact orders as a child arrangements order sets out the person the child should live with and the contact arrangements with the other parent or other extended family members.   A child arrangements order can be very flexible and can say that there should be equal or shared parenting or, at the other extreme, the court order can say that one parent should have no contact or only indirect or supervised contact with the child.   When making a child arrangements order the court will make an order that the family law judge thinks is in your child’s best interests. The judge will consider arrange of factors when making his or her decision. These factors are known as ‘the welfare checklist’. The checklist includes looking at your child’s wishes and feelings in light of your child’s age and understanding as well as assessing how capable each parent is of meeting your child’s physical and emotional needs.   When considering the welfare checklist and what specific child arrangements order to make the court won't consider the legal status of the parent’s relationship as a very relevant factor in the decision making process. That is because the test for what child arrangements order to make, and who should get custody, is based on what is in your child’s best interests rather than the status of the parent’s relationship.   In today’s age, family judges are of the view that whether you are a married mother or father or unmarried the issue for the court to determine is what custody and contact order best meets a child’s needs. A mother and father may have been in an unmarried relationship for many years and whilst you may think that in that scenario the mother will have more ‘’rights’’ over their child a judge will make a child arrangements order, setting out the custody and contact, that he or she thinks will meet the needs of the child. For example, if the father is a loving father who has always enjoyed a close relationship with the child a shared care order may be appropriate. On the other hand, if one parent has either been physically or emotionally abusive towards the child then this would be a reason to give custody of the child to the other parent and to stop or limit the contact to the other parent. [related_posts] When it comes to children law the court looks at things from the perspective of what is best for the child and in the child’s interests. That consideration does not pay a lot of heed to whether you are married or unmarried or in a civil partnership but instead focusses on your child and their characteristics and needs. Accordingly, in the court’s eyes, it is far more important that a parent wants and is able to commit to a long term relationship with their child after a parental separation than the legal status of the parental relationship.   If you are a parent engaged in a custody or contact dispute then children law solicitors will recommend that you don’t focus on the status of your relationship with the other parent and instead focus on your child’s needs and best interests. That way the court is far more likely to be persuaded to make the type of child arrangements order that you are seeking. How can Evolve Family Law help? At Evolve Family Law we recognise that every family is different and we therefore welcome calls to discuss how we can help your family, whether it is an application for a parental responsibility order or a child arrangements order or to discuss the potential legal costs of going to court for a child custody order. Call us or complete our online enquiry form . We can also set up a video conference, skype or telephone appointment so you can speak to an experienced Cheshire children law solicitor from anywhere in the world.

Although child maintenance sounds obvious it isn’t as many parents question what child maintenance is for. In this blog we look at the topic of child maintenance and discuss what child support is for.   What is Child Maintenance? Some parents take a very narrow view of what child support is (pocket money and birthday presents) whereas other parents think that child maintenance should cover all the household outgoings (the mortgage, heating costs, the food bill for everyone in the house as well as holidays). Child maintenance solicitors say that there is official guidance on what child maintenance is for. The government says that child maintenance is ‘financial support towards your child’s everyday living costs when you’ve separated from the other parent’.   The government definition of child maintenance doesn’t really drill down into what child maintenance covers but child support solicitors question how relevant that is when the bottom line is that child maintenance is calculated by the Child Maintenance Service based on the paying parent’s income rather than the child’s everyday living costs. The Child Maintenance Service formula means the paying parent has to pay a percentage of their income in child maintenance, whether or not the child maintenance figure is less or more than the child’s everyday living costs.   There are some exceptions and cases where a child’s everyday living costs are more relevant when calculating how much should be paid in child maintenance. These include: Both parents want to agree a figure for child maintenance based on the child’s needs rather than using the Child Maintenance Service mathematical formula The parent paying child support has received a maximum child maintenance assessment from the Child Maintenance Service and the parent receiving the child support has applied to court for top-up child maintenance. Top up child maintenance is based on a child’s needs. The court will look at the standard of living enjoyed by the family before the relationship breakdown when assessing the figure for top up child support (for example, swimming lessons, tennis coaching , piano tuition and other child related expenditure) The child suffers from a disability and has specific additional costs associated with their disability. The parent receiving the child maintenance can apply to court for an order to help cover the additional costs (for example, equipment or treatment not available on the National Health Service) The child is being privately educated or a parent wants the child to go into private education and makes an application to court for a school fees order to cover the cost of private school fees and extras (for example, extra tuition or school ski trips) The very limited circumstances in which the family court retains jurisdiction to make a child maintenance order. Although, in these situations the court will look at the amount of child maintenance that would have been payable had the Child Maintenance Service had jurisdiction to make a child maintenance assessment.   Can a parent say what their child maintenance should pay for? When one parent is paying child maintenance to the other parent it isn’t uncommon for the parent paying child maintenance to be highly critical of the other parent’s expenditure and use of the child support. For example, they may criticise the quality of the child’s clothing or dietary choices. In other scenarios, parents have been known to expect the parent receiving the child support to provide everything for the child during contact visits because the other parent is receiving child maintenance.   Child support solicitors recommend that parents try to resolve child maintenance by agreement with the help of their family solicitors before making an application to the Child Maintenance Service for a child maintenance assessment. Negotiations mean parents can each take into account the other’s circumstances when reaching an agreement on the level of payment of child support.   What is not covered by child maintenance? It is just as important to understand what isn’t covered by child maintenance as it is to understand what child maintenance is for.   Child maintenance from the Child Maintenance Service doesn’t cover: Child maintenance for step-children. An application to court can be made for child support for step-children School fees for the costs of private education. An application to court can be made for a school fees order. The court can order that a parent pays all the school fees or a proportion of them. [related_posts] How does spousal maintenance fit in with child maintenance? Many people question what child maintenance is for because they have been ordered to pay child maintenance by the Child Maintenance Service and ordered to pay spousal maintenance by the court.   When the Child Maintenance Service assess how much should be paid in child maintenance they use a strict mathematical formula that doesn’t take into account an ex-spouse’s spousal maintenance or other sources of income. However, when the court is assessing how much spousal maintenance should be paid the judge will take into account: The ability of the paying spouse to pay spousal maintenance taking into account their child maintenance liability as assessed by the Child Maintenance Service The reasonable future income and outgoings of each spouse The earnings capacity of each spouse and whether that will change, for example, through vocational training or because of ill health Whether there is a shortfall in one spouse’s income taking into account their reasonable income and outgoings, the payment of child maintenance and earnings capacity and, if so, taking into account factors such as the length of the marriage or capital distribution, decide if spousal maintenance should be paid and, if so, for how long.   Negotiating child support and spousal maintenance can be complicated so it is best to take legal advice on your options and the range of likely orders that a court would make if either you or your ex-spouse were to either apply to court for spousal maintenance or for an order to reduce or increase the amount of spousal maintenance payable. An application can be made to vary spousal maintenance because of a change in the payer or payee’s financial or other circumstances. Manchester and Cheshire Child Maintenance Solicitors If you need advice on calculating or paying or receiving child maintenance or need help with negotiating a financial settlement or sorting out child custody after your separation or divorce then the child maintenance solicitors at Evolve Family Law can help you. Call us or complete our online enquiry form. Our offices in Holmes Chapel, Cheshire and Whitefield, Manchester are open for face to face meetings, however an appointment is required. We also offer remote meetings by appointment by video call or telephone for those who prefer not to travel.

Families come in all different shapes and sizes and don’t just comprise the standard mum, dad and 2.4 children. Many of us joke that we would like to adopt a neighbour as a grandparent but in some families there is a real desire to adopt an adult, often because a step-parent wants to formally recognise their adult step-child or a parent wants to offer a home to a young adult following the death of the child’s parents or their alienation from their biological parents. In this blog we look at whether you can adopt an adult. Can you adopt an adult in the UK? Under UK law you can't adopt an adult, whatever the motivation for your desire to adopt.  UK adoption law says that the child who is the subject of the adoption application must be: Under the age of eighteen at the time that the adoption order application is made and Unmarried and not in a civil partnership (and never been in such a relationship). Sometimes people want to adopt a teenage relative from overseas or a young adult, thinking that adoption is a way of uniting the family in the UK.  Adoption of a child nearing the age of eighteen is technically possible but adoption solicitors recommend that specialist immigration law advice is taken before you proceed. [related_posts] What are the alternatives if you can't adopt an adult? As UK adoption law says that you can't adopt anyone over the age of eighteen what are the alternatives to the making of an adoption order?   Some relatives of young people assume that they will be able to apply to the family court for a child arrangements order as an adoption order isn’t an option. However, UK children law says that a child arrangements order expires when a child reaches the age of eighteen and that an application for a child arrangements order should only be made in exceptional circumstances where a child is aged between sixteen and eighteen at the time of the court application.   If children court orders aren’t the solution then practical options include: If having the same surname is important to both of you, the person you would like to adopt can change their name to your family name by deed poll You can financially protect the person that you would like to adopt by making a Will and leaving a legacy or share of your estate to them. If you do not make a Will then they won't be entitled to receive anything from your estate under intestacy rules if they are not closely biologically related to you and they haven’t been adopted by you If the person you wanted to adopt wants to look after you then you can appoint them as an attorney in your Lasting Power of Attorney If the person you would like to adopt doesn’t have capacity to make their own decisions (for example because of physical or mental impairment) you can ask the high court to make a declaratory order setting out with whom the person should live and have contact with. The high court only has the power to make this type of declaratory order in relation to an adult over the age of eighteen if the adult doesn’t have the capacity to make his or her own decisions.   If you would like to adopt an adult but realise that isn’t an option under UK law the best thing that you can do for the adult that you would like to adopt is to put your affairs in order and make sure that your paperwork, such as your Will and Lasting Power of Attorney , accurately reflects your wishes. Sadly, if you don’t sort out your Will and any associated paperwork the likelihood is that not only will you not be able to adopt your adult loved one but they may not benefit from your estate if you pass away. Preparation and paperwork is therefore essential to protect your loved ones. ​ How can Evolve Family Law adoption solicitors help? At Evolve Family Law our specialist children and adoption solicitors can answer your questions about children and adoption law and help you with all your private client and Will needs. Call us or complete our online enquiry form . We can set up a meeting, video conference, skype or telephone appointment with one of our specialist solicitors.

The law allows you to apply for a family law injunction order if you have experienced coercive control and behaviour. In this blog, our family law solicitors look at what is meant by coercive control and behaviour.   If you need family law advice, contact Evolve Family Law.   What is coercive control and behaviour? Coercive behaviour is: Any act designed to force or coerce you into doing something against your will, An act that is intended to harm or intimidate you. Acts can include physical threats as well as other forms of humiliation or words said by your partner that make you feel as if you are no longer in control of your life or actions.   The law on coercive behaviour The law says coercive and controlling behaviour is an act designed to make you feel subordinate or dependent on your partner.  This could involve: Isolation from friends and family. Preventing independent acts or thoughts. Regulation of behaviour.   Examples of coercive control and behaviour Here are some examples of real-life coercive behaviour: Controlling what you eat and weigh (you may be told that this is for ‘your own good’, but it is still coercive and controlling behaviour). Stopping you from having a shower or bath at times other than stipulated. Preventing you from leaving the family home on your own or stopping you from seeing your friends and family. Restricting your access to money so you only get an allowance to buy food and must account for any money spent by you. Telling you that you can’t pick up the baby or play with the children other than at times allowed. Telling you that you can’t go online or monitoring your computer and telephone usage. Dictating what clothes you should wear (either too modest or too flamboyant for your taste) or saying what make-up you can wear (if any). Coercive control can occur remotely.  Some of the most intimidating coercive behaviour can be carried out by bombarding someone with text messages and phone calls, or remote spying activities.   Coercive control and who it affects Coercion and control does not just affect women in heterosexual relationships. Women can also coerce and control their male partners or husbands. Coercion and control also occur in same sex relationships. If something amounts to coercive and controlling behaviour, then it doesn’t matter if you are married, in a civil partnership or cohabiting and living together. It is the act or behaviour that is important rather than the legal status of your family relationship. If a partner is controlling, their behaviour may also affect the children. For example, they may not give the children appropriate freedoms for their age, or the children may be emotionally affected by witnessing the coercive control exercised by one parent over the other.   Recognising Coercive Behaviour Coercive and controlling behaviour can be insidious and hard for you or your friends and family to spot. That is because the coercion can be subtle or the degree of control can grow slowly over time, so you don’t recognise it for what it is. For example, getting you to agree that it is too much hassle to see your mother every week, to eventually telling you who you can and can’t see. When you are in a relationship, or you are a close friend or family member, it can be hard to spot or recognise coercive behaviour, often because it is dressed up as ‘only wanting to do what is best’ or because it is said you are so stupid or mentally unwell that your partner or husband or wife knows what is best for you. What one person would describe as coercive and controlling behaviour may be the normal experience of a husband, wife or partner who is so used to such controlling behaviour that they have become immune to it and adapted their life and thought processes around their partner’s behaviour so as not to upset them or to fit in. It is often only when you see your husband, wife, or partner starting to exercise the same coercive behaviour on your child, and you see the impact of that behaviour on your child’s demeanour and personality, that you realise that you have got to do something. In other families, it takes a close friend or family member to point out that what your partner sees as loving behaviour is stifling you and is coercive behaviour. In the past, you could only get a judge to make a family law injunction order if there had been domestic violence involving a trip to the hospital or doctor. Those days are long gone, with family judges realising that any form of domestic violence, from serious sexual assault to a slap or a push or coercion, is unacceptable.   What can I do about coercive behaviour in my relationship? If you are being subjected to coercion and control in your relationship, you can: Try to get your partner to see their behaviour for what it is and to change. This may involve counselling to get to the root cause of the coercive behaviour. In some family situations, the nature of the coercive control is such that it is not safe or healthy for you to stay in the relationship. Counselling and trying to stay together may not be a realistic option, as you need to leave the family home and separate permanently. Separate and start divorce proceedings. You can initiate no-fault divorce proceedings without needing to mention the behaviour in the divorce application. It is still important to tell your divorce solicitor about the behaviour. They can talk to you about your injunction options. Separate and start injunction proceedings. The family court makes an injunction order. The court can either make a non-molestation or an occupation order to protect you and your children Make a complaint to the police. The Serious Crime Act 2015 created a new criminal offence of controlling or coercive behaviour in an intimate or familial relationship. If your partner is found guilty, then in a serious case of coercive behaviour, they could be sent to prison for up to five years.   What is a non-molestation order? A non-molestation injunction order is a family court order that stops the person who is behaving in a coercive or controlling manner towards you or your child from continuing to do so.   What is an occupation order? An occupation injunction order is a family court order that prevents the person behaving in a coercive or controlling manner towards you or your child from continuing to live at the family home or from re-entering it, or restricts your partner or spouse from certain rooms in the family home.   Breaching an injunction order If your partner or spouse breaches a family court injunction order, it constitutes contempt of court and a criminal offence.   You might also be interested in [related_posts]   Talking to your divorce and family law solicitor about coercive behaviour If you take the step of deciding to speak to a divorce solicitor about your marriage or relationship, it is essential to tell them about the coercive control. Many people are too embarrassed to talk about their partner or spouse’s behaviour, or they decide that their partner’s behaviour isn’t relevant because they don’t want to apply for an injunction order. Even if you don’t want your divorce solicitor to act on the coercive behaviour information and apply for an injunction, it is still important to tell them about it so that they understand why you may have concerns about your children having contact and why you want a child arrangements order or why you may want a financial settlement that includes a clean break financial court order.   How Evolve Family Law can help you The family law solicitors at Evolve Family Law will support you during your relationship breakdown and help you find the best long-term family solutions for you and your family. Our family lawyers are approachable and friendly, providing expert divorce, children and financial settlement advice, with experience in advising on separations or divorces where a partner has been abusive or is narcissistic and controlling.     Contact Evolve Family Law Today for Expert Family Law Advice.

We all know that we can't put a price on our children and their happiness but before you instruct a children and family law solicitor to go to court for a child arrangements order it is understandable that you want to know the answer to the question ‘’How much does it cost to go to court for child custody UK?’’ In this blog we look at UK child custody cases and legal fees. How much does it cost to go to court for child custody? At Evolve Family Law when a parent asks us how much it will cost to go to court for a child custody order we take a step back and ask the right questions to make sure that court proceedings are necessary as we don’t believe that there is any point in spending money on child custody legal fees if you don’t need to do so.   For example, sometimes alternative options are both cheaper and quicker than a child custody application, such as a strongly worded solicitor’s letter, legal support and family mediation or counselling. In other family scenarios, a court application for a child arrangements order may not be justified if your child is nearly sixteen or if the child custody arrangements are currently agreed but you want a child custody or contact order ‘’just in case’’.   You may question why at Evolve Family Law we won't push or encourage you to start child custody proceedings if we don’t think that is the best option for you and your child. We won't advise you to start child custody proceedings if we think there is a better or more effective solution even though we lose out in legal fees. That’s because we are committed to listening to you and to why you want to apply for child custody orders whilst at the same time being transparent about legal fees and whether we think the costs are necessary or justified.   Evolve Family Law were one of the first firms of solicitors to publish their fees online as we believe that it is important to be transparent and upfront about legal fees so you know what to expect and to help you budget for costs. The Evolve Family Law price guide can be accessed here. [related_posts] Fixed fees and child custody applications As Cheshire and North Manchester children solicitors we are often asked why fixed fees are offered for divorce proceedings or for the drafting of a financial court order as part of a divorce financial settlement but not for an application for a child arrangements order or for a child custody application.   Whilst we publish hourly rates for our specialist children lawyers and support staff, we encourage you to call us to discuss potential costs of going to court for child custody. That’s because , unlike with divorce proceedings or drafting a financial court order, there are so many variables that we need to speak to you about your planned application and family circumstances before we can give you realistic cost information.   In some situations the cost of a solicitor letter, legal support during family mediation or even going to court for a child arrangements order may be less than you might think but in other scenarios the costs may be a lot higher and the ethos at Evolve Family Law is to explain about the potential court complexities and child custody court costs from the outset.   Our children lawyers are asked what makes a child custody case complex. Here are some examples of complicated child arrangements order applications: Serious allegations of physical, emotional or sexual abuse that will require significant investigation, the potential instruction of child experts, and a series of court hearings including what is referred to as a ‘’finding of fact hearing’’ for the family law judge to determine and make findings on the allegations of abuse. There may then be a second substantive hearing , referred to as a ‘’welfare hearing’’ , for the family law judge to determine what child arrangements order should be made Family situations involving parental alienation where one parent is wholly opposed to the children having contact with the other parent or where there has been a long history of previous proceedings and failure to comply with court orders Allegations of domestic violence against a parent and the parent who is alleging that domestic abuse has taken place maintains that it isn’t safe for the children to see or live with their other parent. In some court proceedings involving serious allegations of domestic violence a judge may order a finding of fact hearing Contested jurisdiction where one parent maintains that the children are not habitually resident in the UK and the proceedings should take place overseas or where there are allegations of parental child abduction of the children to the UK Children cases where there are special circumstances such as a local authority or extended family members (such as grandparents) intervening in the court proceedings.   The list above isn’t exhaustive but just sets out some examples of how some child custody cases can be a lot more complicated and involve court appointed experts and a series of directions and substantive court hearings. In other family scenarios, you may be able to reach an agreement over child custody and contact arrangement at the first or second hearing of your court application, without the need to prepare statements, instruct experts or attend a contested court hearing. How can Evolve Family Law help? As every family is different, at Evolve Family Law we welcome calls to discuss the potential legal costs of going to court for a child custody order. Call us or complete our online enquiry form . We can also set up a video conference, skype or telephone appointments.

The Sunday Times recently ran a piece on ‘emotional labour’ and here at Evolve Family Law that sparked a debate about what emotional labour is and to what extent it plays a part in UK divorce proceedings. If you aren’t sure what emotional labour is and how it could affect your divorce proceedings then read on.​ What is Emotional Labour? Apparently the term ’emotional labour’ first began to be used back in 1983 to describe repressed feelings and emotions at work. Whilst we may not have head of the term we have all bitten back a sharp comment or retort to a work colleague at one point or other, knowing that a sarcastic reply won't help with the need to work together. Fast forward to 2020, and the term emotional labour is now being used in the home environment. I am sure all of you will have suppressed your first thoughts and replies when asked about whether you want the bins taken out, the dishwasher emptied or what time the meal will be ready for as your other half has plans for the evening (that don’t include you).   Emotional labour isn’t just about suppressing your first response to your partner when asked if you want the dishwasher emptied when there are no clean cups or plates in the cupboard and you have just come off a ten hour shift with your other half and the children looking expectantly for their evening meal. It is also about all the other things in a relationship that can quietly drive you crazy as you feel obliged to hide your true feelings for the sake of your partner’s feelings and/or the children’s feelings. Examples include: Having to have the mother in law to Sunday dinner each week when she clearly can't stand you and never reciprocates with an invitation back Always having to select the children’s birthday presents but not say anything when the children assume that the present was chosen jointly Taking sole responsibility for taking the children to rugby practice when you can't stand sport or the biting wind, and would also much prefer a Sunday lie in (like your partner) having worked hard all week and not being the parent who’d encouraged the child to try for a place in the rugby team in the first place.   Do any of those examples ring true in your relationship? Our Manchester divorce solicitors say that it is often only when the decision to separate has been made that either a husband or wife will realise and acknowledge that they are doing the work of two people in the relationship. [related_posts] Does Emotional Labour Lead to Divorce Proceedings? Whilst you don’t currently hear husband or wife's saying that they are getting divorced because of ‘emotional labour’, it is undoubtedly the case that emotional labour is behind some marriage breakdowns and the commencement of divorce proceedings based on the unreasonable behaviour of either a husband or wife.   Can anything be done to stop emotional labour and the breakdown of a marriage? Divorce lawyers are positive that in the right scenario there is help available such as: Family or couple therapy to discuss how you feel and the need for change Individual therapy to help you accept your husband or wife's behaviour and the fact that they aren’t likely to change Professional help to ease the load on one partner in the relationship, whether that is a housekeeper, cleaner or au-pair.   If you can't stop the emotional labour (and can't live with it) then it may prompt divorce proceedings. The divorce proceedings could be based on your partner’s unreasonable behaviour as, in 2020, it is clear that a relationship needs to be if not an equal division of work and home labour then at least a fair one so one partner doesn’t feel they are hard done by and has to suppress emotional labour as that isn’t healthy for the individual and will eventually lead to the start of divorce proceedings unless the problem can be acknowledged and change occurs.   At Evolve Family Law we are grateful to the Sunday Times for giving a name to ‘emotional labour’, something that we are all aware of and with an understanding of just how pernicious the problem can be when you are caught up in a long standing relationship where one partner’s feelings and emotions just don’t count. Online and Manchester and Cheshire Divorce Solicitors Manchester and Cheshire based Evolve Family Law solicitors specialise in family law and divorce proceedings. If you need legal help with family law, from divorce to your financial settlement or childcare arrangements, call Evolve Family Law or complete our online enquiry form to set up a meeting, video conference or telephone appointment.

It is all very well asking the question ‘’Do I have parental responsibility for my child?’’ but it is equally important to understand what parental responsibility means and what you can and can't do with it. In this blog we look at what parental responsibility is, who does and doesn’t have parental responsibility, what you need to do if you want parental responsibility and we answer frequently asked questions on the topic of parental responsibility. What does parental responsibility mean? Parental responsibility is a legal concept. That means you can be a responsible parent and not have parental responsibility for your child.   The definition of the legal concept of parental responsibility is contained in Section 3(1) of the Children Act 1989.  The Act defines parental responsibility:   “The rights, duties, powers, responsibilities and authority which by law a parent of a child has in relation to the child and his property”.   In practical terms, parental responsibility gives a parent the responsibility for making significant decisions in a child’s life. Examples of the exercise of parental responsibility Parents exercise parental responsibility for their children all the time, without even thinking about it. However there are some significant decisions involving the welfare of a child that parents can struggle to agree on. For example: The name of the child If the child should follow a religious belief and, if so, if the child should be baptised or circumcised If the child should have contact with family members you are estranged from, for example, grandparents or an aunt If the child should be immunised or vaccinated If the child should go on overseas school trips If the child should follow a strict diet such as gluten free, vegan ,vegetarian or sugar free diet If the child should be home educated or go to a local state school or be placed in private education The type of schooling or extra tuition that best meets a child’s needs if the child is gifted or has special educational needs.   There are many other examples of parental responsibility decisions. Some, whilst relatively insignificant, may be of immense importance to you, such as the length of your child’s hair or at what age your child is allowed to have an ear piercing or have their own mobile phone. What happens if you can't agree on parenting decisions and parental responsibility? If two parents have parental responsibility and can't agree on how to exercise parental responsibility then either parent can apply to court for a specific issue order but courts recommend that: Parents try to discuss parenting and reach a compromise that they can both accept Parents try family mediation if they can't reach an agreement to see if a neutral family mediator can help them reach an agreement Court proceedings are used as a last resort. What to do next? If you are worried about your child because you think that your former partner’s alcohol or substance use is affecting their relationship and contact is having an adverse effect on your child then before you stop or change contact it is best to take legal advice from a children law solicitor and professional advice. Speaking to someone else can help you come to a balanced view on whether an application for a child arrangements order is in your child’s best interests and your alternative options.   If you are a parent who has had allegations of drug or alcohol abuse made against you then the best advice is to take legal advice. That is because the first thing many parents do is deny there is a problem. Sometimes there isn’t a problem. However, if there is an issue with alcohol consumption, then denying that the problem exists makes it more likely that the court will make a child arrangements order that you are unhappy with whereas that outcome can potentially be avoided through cooperation and representation. How does an unmarried father get parental responsibility for his child? An unmarried father can get parental responsibility in one of three ways: By agreement with the child’s mother or Jointly registering the birth and being named on the birth certificate or Obtaining a parental responsibility order from the court. Can I prepare a parental responsibility agreement? To secure parental responsibility for your child you have to sign a formal parental responsibility agreement document in a prescribed form. The form has to be witnessed. If you don’t use the correct forms or if you don’t get the agreement witnessed in accordance with the rules then the agreement won't be effective in giving you parental responsibility. Does a father lose parental responsibility for a child if he gets divorced? A father doesn’t lose parental responsibility for his child if he separates or gets divorced from the child’s mother.   A father can only lose parental responsibility by court order once he has obtained it. It is rare for a court to order that a father should lose his parental responsibility. Can a father have contact with a child without having parental responsibility? A father can have contact with his child if he is separated from the child’s mother without first having to obtain parental responsibility for the child. If the mother won't agree to a father having parental responsibility and contact the father can make an application to court for a parental responsibility order and a child arrangements order.   A child arrangements order sets out where a child lives and the contact arrangements. The court will make orders that it thinks are in the child’s best interests. Does a father have to pay child support if he is not named on the birth certificate and doesn’t have parental responsibility? A parent’s legal obligation to pay child support for their child is based on their biological relationship. Therefore a biological father has to pay child support if he is assessed as liable to do so by the Child Maintenance Service, even if he is not named on the birth certificate, doesn’t have parental responsibility, and doesn’t see the child.   In situations where paternity is disputed the Child Maintenance Service can ask for DNA testing to be undertaken and the court can order relationship testing. Does a mother with automatic parental responsibility for a child have more authority and rights than an unmarried father who secures parental responsibility? Sometimes being a parent can feel a bit competitive; whether it is you that your child cries for when they have fallen or you that they ask to read them a bed time story. When it comes to parental responsibility many unmarried fathers assume that their parental responsibility isn’t ‘’as good as a mother’s parental responsibility’’ because there parental responsibility was acquired through: Being named on the birth certificate or Parental responsibility agreement or Parental responsibility court order.   An assumption is therefore made by one or both parents that the father’s rights and responsibilities are somehow less important than the mother’s parental responsibility and that: A mother has more rights than a father A mother will always get custody if there is a dispute A mother has the responsibility to sort out child care if neither parent is available to look after the child If you can't agree on an important decision in your child’s life the mother’s parental responsibility takes precedence giving her the power to make the decision.   None of those assumptions are correct. If you share parental responsibility with another person you have equal rights and responsibilities for the child. The child’s mother does not have the casting vote or the ability to make all the decisions. If you can't reach agreement about what is in your child’s best interests then the court can make a specific issue order. The court will make a specific issue order decision based on what the judge thinks is in a child’s best interests. [related_posts] Will the court always make a parental responsibility order? A father can apply for a parental responsibility order as a separate stand-alone application or at the same time as applying for a child arrangements order (an order sorting out custody or contact).   The court won't automatically make a parental responsibility order but the test or threshold to secure a parental responsibility order is fairly low so in most cases the court will grant parental responsibility.   When deciding whether to make a parental responsibility order the court considers: The degree of commitment shown by the father The degree of attachment between father and child The father’s reasons for applying for a parental responsibility order. If I have parental responsibility can I take my child abroad on holiday? If you are a parent with parental responsibility for your child you can't take your child abroad on holiday unless: You have the agreement of everyone else with parental responsibility for your child or You have a child arrangements order and you are named as the main carer in the child arrangements order. If you have this type of child arrangements order then you can take your child overseas for up to four weeks without needing the other parent’s agreement or a court order You have an order from the court giving you permission to go on the specific holiday or a general order saying that you can take your child overseas on a set number of times each year.   If you are not sure whether the wording of your child arrangements order gives you permission to take your child overseas on holiday it is best to take legal advice before booking the holiday. Can my child’s surname be changed if I have parental responsibility for my child? If you have parental responsibility for your child then your child’s surname should not be changed without your written agreement or a court order. Is a court application for parental responsibility worth it? Most children law solicitors would encourage you to secure parental responsibility by agreement with the child’s mother. If a mother takes legal advice the likelihood is that she will be advised that it is probable that the court will make a parental responsibility order. She may therefore agree to your acquiring parental responsibility by agreement and without making a court application.   If a mother won't agree to you having parental responsibility for your child then you may think that you have no option but to make an application for a parental responsibility order because you think that until you secure parental responsibility the child’s mother won't accept that you have any say in the important decisions affecting your child. However, if you have separated amicably and you are co-parenting your child, you make think that parental responsibility won't really add anything for you or your child. It is always best to have parental responsibility and, in those circumstances, you should be able to obtain parental responsibility by agreement through completing the prescribed form for parental responsibility. Parental Responsibility Solicitors For legal assistance with parental responsibility, child custody or contact or applying for a parental responsibility order, child arrangements order, or specific issue order contact the specialist Cheshire and Manchester children law solicitors at Evolve Family Law. Call us or complete our online enquiry form.

As specialist children law solicitors we are asked if the family court will order that a husband or wife or an ex-partner cannot have contact with their child because of parental alcohol addiction. There isn’t a yes or no answer as in every case the court will look at what is in the best interests of the child. In this blog we look at the topic of alcohol addiction in children law proceedings. Can alcoholism stop child contact? Children solicitors will tell you that it is too broad a question to ask ‘’can alcoholism stop child contact?’’ as so much depends on: Whether the alcoholism has an effect on the parent’s behaviour towards the child or the other parent The age of the child The effect (short and long term) of not having an ongoing relationship with a parent The measures that could be put in place to make contact safe and rewarding for the child The help available for the child and parents.   When a children law solicitor is asked about alcoholism and child contact they will normally want to know how one parent’s alcohol use affects their daily life and their behaviour towards their child. That is because there are many people with ‘’functioning alcoholism’’ who are able to work and enjoy relationships whereas sadly that isn’t the case for others.   That is why it is so important that children law solicitors take the time to discuss your particular family circumstances and drill down to what it is about the alcohol usage that makes you want to stop child contact. A case study of how alcohol affects child contact One mother whose ex-husband was a highly successful business owner and functioning alcoholic wanted to stop contact between her two teenage sons and their father because of his alcoholism.   What was actually her ‘’drilled down ‘’ cause of concern was her ex-husband insisting that he was ok to drive the children and her fears for their safety. From the mother’s perspective, it was good that her children continued to see their dad so that they knew he was all right and that they didn’t worry about him or hold him on a pedestal because she had stopped contact.   In this mother’s case the best thing to do was to listen to her and help her find the right solution for her children. She knew, from past experience, that as her husband didn’t want to deal with his functioning alcoholism, no amount of requests from her would make him see a counsellor or get help. Likewise, after discussion and legal advice, she knew that one of her teenage sons would blame her if contact stopped whereas the other one found contact embarrassing and wasn’t bothered about going.   Some children law solicitors see an application for a child arrangements order or a prohibited steps order to stop contact as the answer to all problems over contact. It isn’t necessarily the solution. In the mother’s case, after she had taken legal advice on her options, she had the experience to realise that if she applied for a child arrangements order the father would deny his alcoholism and refuse to take part in any testing ordered by the court or psychological assessment or any recommended follow up treatment or support.   Whilst the court has the power to order tests and assessments in child arrangements order applications, the court cannot make a parent undergo alcohol or substance testing or assessment if the parent refuses to do so. All the court can do is draw inferences from a parent’s unwillingness to participate in testing or assessment.   The court’s ability to make inferences is often a powerful motivator in a parent’s willingness to participate in testing and assessment. That is because of the parent’s belief that the testing results should be better for them than inferences based on a lack of cooperation after the other parent has raised sufficient concerns for the court to be willing to sanction testing or assessment.   When it comes to alcoholism and child contact, an application for a  child arrangements order can bring about a lot of change as the court arena can make parents realise just how seriously the other parent views their issue with alcohol. In other families compromise can be the better option for the family.   So you may wonder how the mother of the two teenage boys resolved her dilemma over her ex-husband’s alcoholism and her fears for her teenage sons travelling in a car driven by their father. She looked at what was best for her sons and concluded that maintaining a relationship with their father was the best option for them. Whilst he was unreliable as a father and let the children down he was nonetheless their father and the youngest would blame her, rather than his father’s alcoholism, for the lack of contact.   The mother set about problem solving and instead of the boys going to visit their dad at his home, where there was alcohol and films she didn’t approve of, contact became centred on football matches and she asked her brother in law and the children’s uncle to help provide support and a safe means of transport.   Did the solution work? It certainly wasn’t without its difficulties and it put the teenagers in a position of reporting if there were issues. This was not something the mother felt very comfortable about but she concluded, on balance, that it was the right thing to do even if on occasion she was used as a taxi service and the boys were let down when their father didn’t show up.   Would the child contact solutions have been different for another parent? As children law solicitors we would say yes. For example: If the parent’s alcoholism was more recent in nature and the parent was more likely to agree to testing and assessment as part of a child arrangements order application The parent’s behaviour, fuelled by their alcoholism, made it dangerous for the other parent to come into contact with them and meant that they needed injunction orders to protect themselves The child wasn’t old enough to help safeguard themselves. In that scenario contact fully supported by grandparents or taking place within a contact centre may be the best option for the child The child was of an age to say that they didn’t want to see their parent and the other parent fears that forcing them to have contact isn’t actually best for the child. Sometimes family counselling is one way forward if a child and parent will agree to this so an older child can explain , in a safe and neutral setting, how they feel and how not turning up for pre-arranged contact or any other effects of the alcohol addiction makes the child feel. Recreational use, binge drinking, dependence or alcohol addiction Children law solicitors will tell you that one of the biggest issues in trying to resolve parenting and childcare arrangements when there are alcohol or substance use concerns is the parent’s differing perception of the issue.   Many dedicated and caring parents say that they are ‘’recreational users’’ of substances or over imbibe and binge drink at the weekends. Should that affect their contact with their child? It all depends on the parenting arrangement as, for example. alternate weekend contact and midweek contact may meet the child’s needs and not affect the parent’s lifestyle choices. It can sometimes be hard for the other parent to accept that such contact could be in a child’s best interests when they have lived full time with the parent’s binge drinking behaviour.   It is equally hard when one parent believes that the other is alcohol dependent and the other disputes it. Sometimes practical, non-judgemental examples of how a child feels can help make contact work, for example, saying how the child feels if the parent doesn’t turn up for contact or arrives late.   If you think that your ex-partner is alcohol dependent or their substance misuse is affecting the quality of their contact then you can ask the court to: Make a child arrangements order to restrict contact, for example, so contact takes place at a contact centre or is supervised by a family member Make a child arrangements order subject to conditions so that the parent must comply with conditions such as not drinking for twenty four hours before a contact visit Stop direct contact between parent and child. Indirect contact such as letters, cards, presents, phone calls and Skype may all be appropriate depending on their content and whether the child gets very distressed if the parent makes promises about Skype calls but then forgets. [related_posts] Ideally, talk of starting an application for a child arrangements order can make a parent realise just how worried the other parent is and even if they don’t see their drinking as a problem they will try to modify their behaviour and drinking around contact times. What to do next? If you are worried about your child because you think that your former partner’s alcohol or substance use is affecting their relationship and contact is having an adverse effect on your child then before you stop or change contact it is best to take legal advice from a children law solicitor and professional advice. Speaking to someone else can help you come to a balanced view on whether an application for a child arrangements order is in your child’s best interests and your alternative options.   If you are a parent who has had allegations of drug or alcohol abuse made against you then the best advice is to take legal advice. That is because the first thing many parents do is deny there is a problem. Sometimes there isn’t a problem. However, if there is an issue with alcohol consumption, then denying that the problem exists makes it more likely that the court will make a child arrangements order that you are unhappy with whereas that outcome can potentially be avoided through cooperation and representation. Cheshire Children Law Solicitors For legal help with children law and child care arrangements where there are allegations of alcohol misuse please call us or contact us online.